The work of appreciative inquiry is something I will take into my work life (thank you!) but the personal side of it really grabbed me. My parents don’t acknowledge my queerness, and I have so much more grief around that than I know. I can’t change their religious or political beliefs. But I can practice gratitude for what I do get from them instead of only feeding my resentment. I can practice this and grieve. It doesn’t justify their actions, but it will allow me to feel more open and expansive.
“I stopped holding on to the disappointment in what my parents couldn’t do for me, in terms of emotional support, and started being grateful for what they could do for me…”
Thanks so much for sharing this, Andrea. I hear you, and stand with you in giving yourself time for that grief and for that gratitude practice. The important thing I learned was to offer each of them ample space and not collapse them into each other. I look forward to hearing how you feel as you practice. Sending love. <3
I awoke this morning feeling depressed - the political scene, climate change, things at home. Reading your post, I identified my feeling as grief. Thank you for this. I realized I needed to go deeper and turned to this poem by David Whyte:
i found myself copying and pasting sections to send to friends , and i ended up sending most of it 😜 ... i'll share on facebook too .
also , i've started an online "gratitude n giggles" where sadness , anger and mischief are all welcome ... where we are thankful for what we do have , and giggle with our own darkness .... with silence to distinguish between them .
The work of appreciative inquiry is something I will take into my work life (thank you!) but the personal side of it really grabbed me. My parents don’t acknowledge my queerness, and I have so much more grief around that than I know. I can’t change their religious or political beliefs. But I can practice gratitude for what I do get from them instead of only feeding my resentment. I can practice this and grieve. It doesn’t justify their actions, but it will allow me to feel more open and expansive.
“I stopped holding on to the disappointment in what my parents couldn’t do for me, in terms of emotional support, and started being grateful for what they could do for me…”
Thanks so much for sharing this, Andrea. I hear you, and stand with you in giving yourself time for that grief and for that gratitude practice. The important thing I learned was to offer each of them ample space and not collapse them into each other. I look forward to hearing how you feel as you practice. Sending love. <3
I awoke this morning feeling depressed - the political scene, climate change, things at home. Reading your post, I identified my feeling as grief. Thank you for this. I realized I needed to go deeper and turned to this poem by David Whyte:
The well of grief
Those who will not slip beneath
the still surface on the well of grief,
turning down through its black water
to the place we cannot breathe,
will never know the source from which we drink,
the secret water, cold and clear,
nor find in the darkness glimmering,
the small round coins,
thrown by those who wished for something else.
Thank you for this Richard. May we go to that source, to find the heart of the grief, and breathe into it, together. <3
Thank you🙏🏾💐
thanks shilpa & chetna
what a fab conversation !
i found myself copying and pasting sections to send to friends , and i ended up sending most of it 😜 ... i'll share on facebook too .
also , i've started an online "gratitude n giggles" where sadness , anger and mischief are all welcome ... where we are thankful for what we do have , and giggle with our own darkness .... with silence to distinguish between them .
it feels like solid gold .
and i'd like to offer it to the jam community .
i hope you can swing by sometime